How to reconcile children and work

For many parents, every day it is more difficult to reconcile work with children. Many feel frustrated, guilty, and even powerless over the lack of time to be with them, for having to leave the education of their children in the hands of third parties, for not being able to participate and accompany them in their activities, etc.

Parents are the basis in structuring the personality of their children and the lack of timeBecause you have to do the job, it forces you to look for quality moments. Although it is unquestionable that this 'abandonment' has repercussions in the formation of the identification of children,the truth is that they end up getting used to and adapting, one way or another, to any type of situation. Some children suffer at first, but they end up getting used to their family's routine.

In special moments, they will miss their parents more, but unfortunately in many cases nothing can be done to solve this situation. We give you some tips on how to reconcile children and work.

When both parents work and must be away from home all day, it is important find and establish moments of encounter between all. The attitude of parents, in this sense, must be planned, since all children need affection, attention, and physical contact with their parents.

The moments that parents share with their children represent a wealth, in every way, for both. In these meetings, parents should be totally involved in them to listen with interest to the experiences of the children. However, the psychologists they say this should be a natural attitude and not an obligation, as it would be contradictory for children to perceive their parents' lack of pleasure at this time.

Parents have an obligation to work, but they should always be, wherever possible, in good and bad, by the side of their children; play and talk with them. If children have the attention and the love they need so much, the affective bond with their parents will be stimulated, and their self-esteem and confidence will be increased. Children need to know that even though they are away from their parents, they will have to follow their rules. Education is not only marked in person.

The need to reconcile family and work life cannot be separated from the idea of ​​co-responsibility in the family and in society itself. We must be aware that people should be valued for who they are, as people, and not for what they have. Teresa López, dean of the Complutense University of Madrid and vice president of the Acción Familiar foundation, proposes four lines of thoughts:

1. Use of time
The responsibility of having children and educating them rests exclusively with the family. Society in general and the public authorities must help it to fulfill its functions. It is not a question of lengthening school hours until ten at night so that children do not 'disturb', or filling them with extracurricular activities so that, in this way, mothers and fathers can work without having to take care of them. It is not logical that irrational working hours force children to stay out of the home longer. We must advocate changing our culture when it comes to the use of time.

2. Family and society
Decisions made within the family must exclusively affect our private sphere. If we have children or not, it is a family decision, and although this decision is something that remains behind closed doors, obviously its consequences come from the family itself, which means that they exist strong interrelationships between decisions that are taken in families and society itself. One affects the other, when it shouldn't.

3. Equality policies
When we talk about family and work conciliation, we usually talk about public policies conceived as women's policies, with which, we fail at the base. These conciliation policies must go beyond the rights of women and incorporate the rights of all family members into the debate with the same intensity.

The reconciliation of family and work life will never be possible if there is no proper co-responsibility, which requires that not only the work that women do within the home be valued, but also their professional role. Society will change as the responsibilities are much more distributed between women and men.

- Source consulted:
Fragments of an article by Teresa López, Dean of the Complutense University and vice president of the Fundación Acción Familiar.

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